


For I Have Promises To Keep

by Katzedecimal



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Gen, Humour, John Watson's Blog, vlog
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-07
Updated: 2013-04-07
Packaged: 2017-12-07 19:16:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/752057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katzedecimal/pseuds/Katzedecimal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For all his other faults, Sherlock is not normally given to revenge.  But John Watson is the exception to many of Sherlock's rules.</p>
            </blockquote>





	For I Have Promises To Keep

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Let_Them_Howl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Let_Them_Howl/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Miles to Go Before I Sleep](https://archiveofourown.org/works/720726) by [Let_Them_Howl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Let_Them_Howl/pseuds/Let_Them_Howl). 



> because _Miles to Go Before I Sleep_ , that's all the reason you need ^_^

The Blog of Dr. John H. Watson

21st May

By the time John finds out about this, it will be too late. - SH

[Many fumbling noises and the camera view tumbling all over, giving more glimpses of the interior of 221b. There is a brief flash of a yellow smiley face on the wall and a quick pan over what appears to be a bull skull wearing headphones. A male voice whisper-calls, "Mrs. Hudson! I'll need to borrow your kitchen timer!"

The view swings downwards to the floor and follows a pair of women's shoes out of the flat, down a set of stairs into another flat, then back up the stairs again. An old lady's voice quietly says, "Are you sure this will work, dear?"

The male voice answers, "It hasn't failed **yet** , Mrs. Hudson," then the camera is swung up and around to show Sherlock Holmes, the consulting detective himself. As usual, he wears his trim suit and the aubergine shirt that strains across his chest despite him being so thin. Unusually, he is grinning.]

Sherlock: Right. Most of you are aware of the perfectly egregious little trick my flatmate played me last week; well, I am reliably informed that turnabout is fair play, isn't that right, Mrs. Hudson?

Mrs. Hudson: That's right, he shouldn't dish it out if he can't take it. 

Sherlock: Right. So. Some people have wondered as to the length of John's military service and whether it has left any lasting impressions on his behaviour. I can assure you, yes it has. John defaults to parade rest when standing, snaps to attention automatically, and one could certainly use his bed for playing tiddlywinks - but best of all, there's **this.**

[The camera swings around and steadies to show John lying on the couch, sound asleep. He's lying on his back and his arm is thrown up across his forehead. His lips are partly open and a small bubble of saliva swells and shrinks with his roughened breath, which is _just_ bordering on snoring. Sherlock tips his head into the frame.]

Sherlock: John can fall asleep literally anywhere, at any time. I found him crashed out in the men's loo at the Yard once. He complains about **my** sleeping habits! - he was still standing at the urinal. 

Mrs. Hudson: He fell asleep at my kitchen table once. Bolt upright! 

Sherlock: Right, so... Although John can fall asleep at the drop of a hat, his senses remain very much alert. Also, he has very strong core muscles. Now, I mentioned that he also snaps to attention instantly: Combine that with his ability to fall asleep anywhere plus his senses remaining alert even though deeply asleep, and you get **this.**

[Sherlock tiptoes into the camera view and over to the coffee table next to the couch. He winds the kitchen timer and sets it on the coffee table, then hurries out of the frame, grinning widely with mischief.]

Sherlock: [poking his head briefly into the camera, eyes twinkling] This never gets old!

[Sherlock vanishes again. The camera holds steady on slumbering John. The scene is quiet apart from John's snores and the ticking of the kitchen timer. 

The timer dings. Abruptly, John's body jack-knifes at the hips, his torso rising smoothly to an upright sitting position without any use of his arms. The hand across his forehead uncurls into a full hand salute and that sets both Sherlock and Mrs. Hudson laughing. He looks around, bleary-eyed, blinking sleepily and following the giggling.]

Mrs. Hudson: It's like a cartoon!

John: Wha's so funny?

[He sees the camera and abruptly comes fully awake. And annoyed.]

John: [looking at someone off camera] What are you two playing at?!

Sherlock: [off camera] Revenge, John! 

John: What?

Sherlock: Revenge! For that stunt you pulled on me last week!

John: Oh god... 

Sherlock: It's live streaming to your blog.

John: It's what?

Sherlock: [chuckling; apparently repeating himself to bleary!John is amusing rather than aggravating] Live streaming! 

John: [staring at him, then at the camera, then at Sherlock again] ...You sod! [he picks up the kitchen timer and stares at it, puzzled, then glares and throws it at Sherlock. It thumps into something off camera.]

Sherlock: Now, John, that's Mrs. Hudson's property.

John: Sod off! ... Sorry, Mrs. Hudson. And sod you for bringing Mrs. Hudson into it!

Sherlock: It was her idea!  
Mrs. Hudson: It was my idea.

John: [stares at the camera, or rather at the holder of the camera] What?

Sherlock: It was her idea.  
Mrs. Hudson: It was my idea, John. 

John: [stares at Mrs. Hudson with a wounded expression] Mrs. Hud-sonnnnnnnnn...! 

 

8 Comments

Oh my God, is that why you keep setting timers off when I'm kipping? I actually do that? Oh my God.

John Watson - 21st May 16:23

 

You don't usually salute. That was perfect. 

Sherlock Holmes - 21st May 16:25

 

I'm sorry, John, I can't stop laughing. I'm so sorry.

Molly Hooper - 21st May 16:35

 

Is that why Lestrade came out of there laughing like that? That was only a fortnight ago!

Sally Donovan - 21st May 17:03

 

Well played, sir!

Mike Stamford - 21st May 17:08

 

I'm never going to live this down, am I.

John Watson - 21st May 17:15

 

OMG Johnny LOLOLOLOLOL omg i'm dying

Harry Watson - 21st May 17:26

 

Never going to live this down.

John Watson - 21st May 17:28


End file.
